Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Just Another Day in Paradise...

After 3 delightful weeks of being spoiled by B's help with the dogs and such, his vacation is over and he's back on the road for work.  It seems like they are extra rotten just after he leaves... and everything else falls apart, too!

3:15am - Osc whines signaling his desire to visit the outdoor commode.  Given we went to bed at 8pm, I'm not annoyed.  That's a long time for the little man to hold it.

6:00am - Osc whines again, signaling his desire to conclude his unfinished business from earlier.  My alarm was set for 6:15 anyway... though the moment I sit up I realize my four-day migraine has just entered its fifth day.  Super.

6:15am - Everyone gets noms and I lay back in bed after having reset the alarm for 7:30.

6:20am - Both dogs in bed, battling because someone's tail touched the other's face; or one of them breathed too loudly in the other's direction... who knows?!  Now I'm annoyed.

6:21am - I yell (does great things for the migraine!).  Everyone stops.  Oscar lays on my left; Nugg on my right.  All is peaceful in 1D once again.

8:15am - I am startled awake by the sound of my alarm and groggily stare at the clock until my eyes focus... 8:15?!?!  Oh crap.  I scramble through a shower and blindly dress before begging the doodle to enter his cage without protest.  He obliges.  (Thank you, Jesus!)

8:40am - I manage to only be 10 minutes late for work... Phew!

5:15pm - I walk through the door and am promptly greeted by a very excited Nugget.  This is, officially, the longest we've been separated for at least the last 3 days!  GASP!  We dance.  Kisses are disbursed equally by both parties.  Oscar barks to indicate it's his turn!

5:19pm - Oscar and I embrace as though we've been separated for, well, 8 hours.  We dance.  Kisses are disbursed equally by both parties.

5:24pm - I read the note left by the dog walker.  No surprises, we're always "cute!".

5:24:47pm - Scratch that.  I look down and SURPRISE!  Someone tracked mud in this afternoon.  Everywhere.  I guess I'm glad I didn't end up steam cleaning the carpets last week.  Sigh...

5:25pm - We head out the door for pre-dinner business.  Nugget slithers away and becomes overly friendly with a boxer who is exactly the opposite of friendly.  She growls.  Nugget cowers... and continues galloping along down the driveway like he's not going to get the beating of his life when I catch him.  (I kid, he gets a light spanking, though through that fur, I doubt he feels it.  His continued defiance affirms that suspicion).

5:35pm - Everyone is back inside.  Nugget hides because he knows he's in trouble.  I flip on the TV hoping catch the last 20 minutes of Ellen before I have to get ready to leave for dinner with a friend.

5:36pm - Something about me sitting down to relax for even 5 minutes triggers an uncontrollable urge amongst the two to begin the loudest of battles right in front of the TV.  Today, a bacon and cheddar filled bone is the source of contention.

5:39pm - I dig the other bacon and cheddar filled bone out of the toy basket.  Coincidentally, it is exactly the same as the bone over which the battle began.  No dice.  The battle continues over cheddar and bacon filled bone #1.  I give up.  They do not.

5:55pm - I successfully coax Oscar back into his crate so I can leave.  Upon putting the lid back on the toothpaste while brushing my teeth, I look up just in time to catch Nugget's blurred reflection in the mirror as he scurries out of the bedroom, unidentified object in mouth.

5:56pm - Cornered in the dining room, he forfeits his stolen treasure: a sock from my laundry pile.  It's really a wonder I have any matching pairs.

6:00pm - I'm finally out the door... and realize I have no idea where I'm going.

Fast forward to 8:30pm - Dinner was ... well the food was awful, but the company great.  Now I have a lot to do before bed.

8:32pm - Dogs out, pottying ensues.  Nugget again needs a stern request to get his tail back inside!

8:37pm - I hastily load some remaining dirty dishes into the dishwasher and set it to start before I go fold laundry in the bedroom.

8:45pm - I re-enter the kitchen en route to the laundry room, pile of dirty clothes in arms, and about bust my butt slipping on a very large puddle on the floor.  The only thing that saves Oscar from being the first suspect is that it's soapy.  How special; the dishwasher is sudsing out the bottom.

8:47pm - I'm scooping suds and water from the bottom of the dishwasher.  Meanwhile, doodle is lapping up the puddle on the floor.  Thanks, but no thanks for the help, Osc.

9:00pm - Dishwasher back in order, laundry back in process.  Cleaning continues.  Dog battle of bones begins again.

10:00pm - A few yelps, barks and sharp squeals later, it appears the boys are tuckered out.  I sit down on the couch to relax, doodle in my lap, Nugg on the floor at my feet.  I'm about ready to call it a night...

The perfect ending to this day will inevitably be the untimely explosive diarrhea experienced by Oscar around 3am.  (See 8:47pm event).

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