This morning, I again learned my lesson the hard way about why I shouldn't walk through the house half awake and barefoot. I was groggier than usual since last night's mysterious sneezing attack prompted me to haphazardly swallow two Benedryl. Is it allergies? The onset of a cold? The Apocalypse? Only time will tell... but I do know that Benedryl sends me into a sleep so deep it can only be rivaled by the winter hibernation of a bear. For all I know, a rave might have occurred in my living room during the night and all I heard was... well, nothing.
As I was rounding up the troops for their morning trip outside, in my Benedryl haze I stepped right into a very large puddle of pee that saturated my dining room carpet. There is only one suspect: Oscar. But there are many questions: When did this occur? Why did this occur? How did I not hear him get out of bed?... Er, scratch that, it must have happened sometime during the alleged overnight rave.
When I awoke